Regarding My Layover In Atlanta

I'm sitting in the Atlanta airport and I actually switched terminals just to get Starbucks cuz fuck Seattle's Best, amiright? So I'm on the fucking gimp tram and this lady in a wheelchair is coming off and the guy pushing her has not done this enough in his life yet where he can forsee re problem of the fattie in the stroller not easily overcoming the gap between the concourse and the train. So this takes a crucial 15 seconds of door is open time and there's like 12 people waiting to enter this door. The lady finally dislodges and somebody tries to enter but the door is closing now. And it is one of those death doors that has cut people in half, there is half a body back in terminal E, in fact, this is a tram full of only lower bodies. So these are Southern folk, they are freaking out and in a large party, so when after much panic, the door decides not to crush one victim and opens, people begin to file in, myself included, like this door is gonna give us all the time in the world, but no. It begins to close again and in an effort to be a gentleman, I put my arm at risk and make the door think it has taken another life. It opens, and the process begins again, and it closes and I'm not about to hold up the whole fucking airport for these four whimsy dipshit ladies so I let it close as one of their friends is stranded outside, left in a terminal ago, and the ladies are distressed. I wave goodbye to the woman as we depart and one of the fatter women tips towards me when the tram goes forward. She apologizes and I tell her "you had to have seen that coming with the way the door tried to close twice." The very attractive
blond doesn't like this even though I've already risked limb for these cunts, so the next 30 seconds of travel are awkward until the automated voice tells us we're arriving at the fucking terminal we all could have walked to if only we weren't so fat and retarded. I point in the forward direction of the tram and tell the woman with balance issues, "You're going to go that way now." The blond scowls, the heiffer chuckles with embarrassment, and then stumbles forward, because she's stupid and didn't listen to me or really likes me and wants me to be right. The door opens and I tell the blonde, "You ladies have a wonderful day," to which, as a Southerner, she begrudgingly responds, "Thanks."

Hahaha LAYOVAS! Amiright?